Archive for February, 2007
You can’t read this and stay in a bad mood….
1.How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
Unique Up On It.
2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
Tame Way, Unique Up On It.
3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?
They Take The Psycho Path.4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
You Boil The Hell Out Of It.
5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete […]Bugs-B-Gone hiding in the closet
A woman was having a passionate affair with an inspector from a pest-control company. One afternoon they were carrying on in the bedroom
together when her husband arrived home unexpectedly.
“Quick,” said the woman to the lover, “into the closet!” and she pushed him in the closet, stark naked.
The husband, however, became suspicious and after a search […]7 Lemons
There once was a religious young woman who went to Confession. Upon entering the confessional, she said, “Forgive me, Father, for I have
sinned.”
The priest said, “Confess your sins and be forgiven.”
The young woman said, “Last night my boyfriend made mad passionate love to me seven times.”
The priest thought long and hard and then said, […]Seeking New OB/GYN!
I was due for an appointment with the gynecologist later in the week. Early one morning, I received a call from the doctor’s office to tell me
that I had been rescheduled for that morning at 9:30am. I had only just packed everyone off to work and school, and it was already around 8:45
am. […]If I had My Life To Live Over
This doesn’t go under “LOL” but didn’t know where else to place it.
IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER - by Erma Bombeck
(written after she found out she was dying from cancer).
I would have gone to bed when I was sick instead of pretending the earth would go into a holding pattern if I […]A Horse Named Laura Lou
A guy was sitting quietly reading his paper when his wife walked up behind him and whacked him on the head with a magazine.
“What was that for?” he asked. “That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Laura Lou written on it,” she replied.“Two weeks ago when I went […]
Mkele & The Elephant
In 1986, Mkele Mbembe was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Mbembe approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee and inspected […]
Republic Women of Las Vegas
I am thinking of joining the National Federation of Republican Women . Don’t know a lot about them yet but I am studying the website. I think I am going to go to a meeting just to see what it’s all about. I would like to get involved with the community.
Bank of “AMERICA”, account closed!
I heard this morning about BOA giving checking accounts and a line of credit to anyone who asks for one and no social security number needed. What a crock of shit!! I can’t believe this is even legal.
I am all for the good ole American way. Come over legally, work hard, […]One For The Girls
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his sweat-shirt seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, What setting do I use on the washing machine?”
“It depends,” I replied. “What does it say on your shirt […]
